Your Waiting Stinks List to a More Exciting (Awkward) Life

Be still before the Lord and Wait patiently for him... (Psalm 37)

My best friends and I are all in seasons of "waiting". Waiting sometimes just sucks. Maybe God has called you to a new city where you don't know anyone. You have started over before, but that doesn't make starting over any easier. Waiting to "fit in" is hard. Or maybe God is preparing an exciting adventure for you. You see it on the horizon, the light at the end of the tunnel; only currently you are stuck in a crappy living situation or a draining job waiting for adventure. Maybe you, unlike all your friends, were called to stay. Stay in a hometown with people you've known forever praying daily for change in a culture that is fine with staying the same. Sometimes we are waiting for God to show us what is next, and sometimes we are waiting for him to make what "is" more bearable. Either way... we all wait. So to make your waiting more exciting I have, per ush, made a list :):

Your Waiting Stinks List to a More Exciting (Awkward) Life:

1. Google every coffee shop in a 30 mile area (may need to extend the mileage if you are living in the village, desert or boonies). Pick a coffee shop a day (Target & Waffle House count).  Your job is to go in like a food critique, more pompous the better, and review. Post your thoughts online.  Secrets don't make friends, but neither do bad reviews. 

2.  Find the lamest place in the lame city that you are currently living in. Make a hysterical scene out front sobbing and crying, "Why me, Lord? Why Me?"  You know that's what you are thinking.

3. Go to a Children's Museum and try to get in without kids. If you have kids, leave them with a sitter. Nothing cures hopelessness better than being accused of being a creeper.

4. Take a trip to one of your local government offices, perhaps the friendly neighborhood DMV or Post Office. Your goal, make friends with a worker behind the counter and invite them to dinner. "How can I help you today?" "By coming to my house for dinner tonight?" Don't forget, frowns are the universal sign of acceptance amongst government officials! 

5. Dance. Naked. (Preferably before Government Official Arrives... stranger danger  people).

6. Redefine Cool. Yes sitting alone on a Friday Night waiting for someone, anyone, to call is cool!

7. Learn to Code. See #6. 

8. Pray for someone else. Crazy how that makes your life seem a little less awful.

9. Call me. See again #6. 

10. Send me pictures of you accomplishing any item on this list, except for #5 which I leave between you and God.